24 November 2008, 09:30 A.M - R.C cemetery
kodungaiyur, North Madras.
At times I hate my mobile phone,especially when it disturbs me after my tough night with American customers on call.It gets into my nerves.T'was a call as this,interrupting my sleep badly.I dragged the 'hellllllllooooooo',it was my mom on the other line,so sweet mom but not this time.she knew that she disturbed me,but with apology as a backdrop with a broken tone she told me 'நம்ம செழியன் அம்மா இறந்துட்டாங்க....'(Chezhian;My bro-in-law's mom died).
They wanted me to go & attend the funeral.Personally,I do not knew her.I was least interested & my mom forced me that i have to represent my family.Grrr.....Why did i grow up ?,the sick thing is i stay at velachery,the funeral is at kodungaiyur,roughly 30 kms.I cant imagine chennai's morning traffic,i feared.After accepting all the excuses,my mom said that they cant come to chennai travelling 450 kms & she added that 30 kms is easy to reach than 450 kms.Eurekha!! she found that.
I fed the poor bike(we call it the 'room bike',where vinod pays the installment but its everyone's possession),Me & prince (My cousin, my room-mate; a very interesting character) started off to kodungaiyur,a hard ride for 1 hr & 45 mins;i never knew even harder part is waiting for me.It was'nt tough to spot the house,but when we went there they took her to the church.We found the church & reached there to join the last few minutes of the Funeral service,they they took her to the cemetery.I am sure it was'nt the same pulse rate as i drove from home till here.
I was feeling chill,it wasn't just the scene that disturbed me,but something far beyond that.The same woman who walked yesterday,can never walk again.she gave up three boys,all matured,2 of 3 was already married.I knew these guys are gonna break out now,but the masculine mind in them was consoling the relatives & making the funeral in order.I believe she was a woman,who was loved by many.As i saw people crying & lamenting,i thought 'How precious a life is ? ?'.A sense of fear started creeping in;what if i crash over a lorry when i get back to room ? how am i gonna take up if my mom dies ? ?As they laid her in the pit,the eldest broke out-he has got two kids-he wept like a kid,knowing that the reason for who he is today is no more.the second son joined him & that was too hard to see.Their loving mom is sleeping silent unknowing that she
is been missed by many.I was moved,that felt so personal to me.
I saw her husband looking at her,froze,speechless & locked at the moment.looking at a female,who means a lot to him.Those hands that held him in all walks of the life,those legs that jumped, hopped, ran & walked with him crossing all hurdles together,face that he loved for years,which he saw developing wrinkles,the heart that loved him & took care of him like no one else can do,After decades together,tonight he's gonna sleep alone.That was a tragedy beyond description.
The last son; a computer-wiz, i never saw him crying, but he stood still looking down his mom lying benign. Now when everyone started dispersing, he stood still at the same place covering his mouth with a hand kerchief, i was not able to take that, i wanted to choke him hard & say, 'Man plz cry,don't hold that in...'.He stood still.
People started moving out, we signed off from the crowd with sad faces. As we drove out, i took the pillion, the whole world looked dark to me & vividly i knew that's not because of the coolers i wore.i was still haunted with a million questions.What a short & uncertain life is this,what have i done worthy in the life ? ? ,will i leave a group that'll miss me ? ?,But the question that echoed very loud & clear was....
Where will i go,if i die now ? ?
"you will know the truth, & the truth will set you free." - John 12:48
Cheers,
-R-
